Humor

This is how I feel about snow right now.   And, like Lorelai, I don’t need a physics lesson right now, no matter how well it’s intentioned:

I caught Adam Sandler’s Chanukah Song on the radio the other day and it made me smile for about an hour.  You’ve probably heard it before, but who can get tired of a song that rhymes “Scrooge is” with “Stooges.”

My rationally selfish friends will get a kick out of this cute little comedy sketch:

(HT: Scribbit)

At Sam’s birthday party at the park, Adam was admiring a little girl in a brown dress with pigtails.  She was impeccably groomed and looked very cute.  We noticed that her parents were sitting on the bench right next to us.  Adam said to her mother, “She’s really cute.”  The mother replied, “She’s a little bossy.”  And then, yelling out to her cute little girl, she said, “Just go down the slide.  Go down the slide, now!  Arianna, play now!”

Adam was trying to remember the name of this kids’ entertainment performer we saw about 6 months ago at a party. 

Adam:  What was that guy called?  The Great Cucumber?  The Great Tortellini?

Me:  It was The Great Zucchini.

And then I laughed so hard that Sam got upset because she thought I was crying.

Rest in peace, California.  An Onion-worthy satire.

Under the influence of spiritual guru Jerry Brown, it began wholesale experimentation in exotic spending programs, eventual resulting in a traumatic 1979 stay at the Prop 13 Rehab Center.

“California loves children,” said Vermont. “California loves children, because deep inside California is a also a child — full of innocent wonder, and the belief that any budget wish can come true as long as you just wish hard enough.”

In 2003 the state rejected suggestions that it was facing bankruptcy, saying that “I can’t be out of money, I still have checks left.”

Did you know that Tweeting can make you immoral?  It’s true, say some scientists.  Here are some excellent points that you just can’t dispute:

…[R]apid-fire news updates and instant social interaction are too fast for the ‘moral compass’ of the brain to process.

…[H]eavy Twitters and Facebook users could become ‘indifferent to human suffering’.

Celebrities of all types – from rugby players to chefs to pop stars – are becoming hooked on the instant updates [and we know celebs are BAD].

‘Lasting compassion in relationship to psychological suffering requires a level of persistent, emotional attention.’

I feel really bad when I see roadkill.  Does that make me moral?  Sometimes I spend minutes upon minutes thinking about the suffering of everyone who ever watched a Michael Moore documentary.  I must be really good.  But those kids today – they’re just moving too darn fast.  I know cuz I have that science stuff to back me up:

The study used compelling, real-life stories to induce admiration for virtue or skill, or compassion for physical or social pain, in 13 volunteers.

 

Here’s a humorous reminder not to take the big things for granted either. 

(Hat tip to Scribbit who chose my favorite line, too.)