February 2010

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When Sammy is very angry, she’ll contradict us in any way she can.  She used to make up words to serve that purpose.  I’d say, “It’s time to wash your hands,” and she’d respond, NO! IT’S TIME TO WASH MY KENG-GANG!

But lately, she’s been using contradiction through rhyme.  I might say, “There is food on your shirt,” and she’ll reply, NO! THERE IS KOOD ON MY SHIRT!  Or, I’ll say, “I like that outfit you’re wearing,” and she’ll say, NO! YOU LIKE THAT POW-BIT I’M WEARING!

The other night, Adam said, “You’re hair looks very pretty,” and Sam replied, NO! MY HAIR LOOKS VERY SHITTY!

Quote

MOMMY, WHAT ARE YOU EATING?

Pork.  Do you know what animal pork comes from?

PEOPLE?

Sammy made up a new nickname for me:  Mumps.  Of course, now Sammy is Sumps, Toby is Tumps, Jinx is Jumps, and Daddy gets the honor of being called Dumps.

Lately, Sammy has taken to asking me, MOMMY, WILL YOU MARRY ME?  Of course, I always say “yes,” and we have a lovely ceremony.

Kelly is hosting this week’s Objectivist Round Up at her blog, Reepicheep’s Coracle.  Happy reading!

Here are two little things I learned at the supermarket today that are not necessarily good, but give me some amusement:

  • I learned who was playing in the Superbowl by reading “Saints v Colts” written in frosting on a cake.  This also clued me into the fact that the Superbowl is this weekend.  (The good news is, though, that I just upgraded my cable and now have NFL Redzone, and look forward to following my favorite sport next season!  Thanks to Diana for alerting me to it.)
  • Thanks to a few trips down the self-service lanes at my supermarket, I am now a better checker and bagger than 95% of the employees there.  Should I be proud or despondent?

One of my favorite apps for my new Droid phone is called Shazam.  When a song you love but don’t know the name of comes on the radio, you hit a button and hold your phone up to the speaker.  The program somehow recognizes the song and tells you what it is.  If you want to buy it, you click another button, and, voila!  The song is now on your phone.  So far I’ve purchased Judas Priest’s You’ve Got Another Thing Comin’and LeAnn Rimes’ I Need You.  I know, strange taste I have.

I’ve tried to use Shazam on classical music but it has failed every time.  I’m not sure if they haven’t built classical music into the database or if the music wasn’t loud enough or what.  I should look that up.  Anyway, the last time I tried it, Sammy and I were in a bagel shop.  Sammy was very interested in the music, which I didn’t recognize. (Luckily, the DJ later informed me that it was Mussorgsky’s Pictures at an Exhibition.) 

While we were listening, the piece was a bit frenzied and a little scary.  Sammy said, MOMMY, THAT’S MAD?  (She always identifies music with emotions, telling me which songs are happy, which are sad, and which are mad.)  I answered, “Yes, it does sound a bit mad, and it sounds a little scary to me.  It makes me think of Snow White running away from the wicked Queen through the forest.”  We listened for a while, and she repeated, with more certainty, THAT’S A MAD ONE.  And then, MOMMY, IS THAT BEETHOVEN?

Over the last year or so since I gave up my unfounded fear of dietary fat, I’ve had to learn new cooking habits.  I think what I’ve learned might be of interest, especially to anyone out there who cooks regularly for a family.  Just to be clear – we are not on any kind of paleo diet here.  We’ve just allowed ourselves to eat more of the high-fat foods we want (especially meat and butter), and we’ve eliminated meals that are primarily carbohydrate-based like any kind of pasta or rice dish.  We still eat most of those carby foods, we just don’t eat much of them. 

What I’ve found is that I spend a lot less time shopping and cooking, I cook real meals more regularly, I actually eat more vegetables, and my family enjoys the food more than ever.

I make real dinners almost every night.  Sure, there is the occasional mac’n'cheese with hot dogs or fish sticks and frozen peas (and we enjoy those things!) but most nights I cook a meat and a fresh vegetable or salad – no more and no less.

I rarely use recipes.  I don’t often make casseroles or anything that requires more than a few ingredients or has to go in the oven for a long time.  I make those things on occasion to keep it interesting, but the planning and shopping and preparing of those kinds of meals takes too much time, and we don’t enjoy them any more than our meat and veggies.  

Lunch is usually leftovers, but Sammy and I also eat a lot of fast food lunches because it’s fun to go out and we can’t afford real restaurants very often.  I feel just fine about it because I know we’re eating well at home, and really, I think fast food is unfairly vilified. 

Because I’m cooking differently, I’ve gradually had to revise my kitchen staples – the ingredients that I keep on-hand at all times.  Now, I can make any meat or vegetable delicious with these items:

  • Onions
  • Canned Parmesan cheese
  • Sliced cheddar (for burgers)
  • Butter
  • Heavy cream (I now buy it by the quart)
  • Whole milk
  • Bottled lemon juice (for emergencies since my lemons seem to go bad so quickly)
  • Minced garlic in a jar (love garlic, hate chopping)
  • Various mustards
  • Mayonnaise
  • Ketchup (used rarely, but important to have)
  • Capers
  • Rice vinegar
  • Balsamic vinegar
  • Olive oil
  • Red wine
  • Soy sauce
  • Worcestershire sauce
  • Sesame oil
  • Tony Chachere’s Original Creole Seasoning (a must for steaks)
  • Canned tomatoes (although I rarely use them)
  • Coconut milk (again, used rarely, but I like to have it in case I want to make a curry sauce)
  • Currants (for salad)
  • Sliced almonds (for salad)
  • A few salad dressings, always including ranch, which is like magic sauce for kids (if we ate salad more often, I’d make my own dressing but we only go through a few bottles a year so it’s not worth it)
  • All the common dried herbs and seasonings

This is usually how I shop and cook:  At the grocery store, I pick out a few meats that are on sale and whatever vegetables tickle my fancy.  (I always buy the bagged lettuce and spinach because there is no way I’m washing that stuff if I don’t have to.)  At this point, I have no idea what I’ll do with any of it.  The other day I bought a cabbage for the first time in years, and had no problem finding a great way to cook it with the things I keep on-hand.  When you allow yourself to use fat in cooking, you don’t need so many ingredients because fat tastes good!

At home, I make a plan for the next few dinners, which is usually based on the expiration dates of the meats or the perishability of the vegetables.  But the plan is something in my head along the lines of, “Steaks, pork, chicken then burgers; asparagus, spinach, salad, then broccoli.”  A half hour before I want to serve dinner, I go in the kitchen and think about how I’ll prepare everything.  I rarely take more than 45 minutes to make dinner, but 30 minutes is the norm.  Here is something I made for just Sammy and myself last week when Adam was on a business trip.  Because I made potatoes, this took a bit more than 30 minutes:

  • Lamb chops with rosemary and thyme, pan-fried in butter, and with a red-wine and cream sauce
  • Baby Yukon Gold potatoes, sliced and fried in butter with garlic powder, onion powder, and lots of salt and pepper (I don’t make potatoes often, but I love these with lamb)
  • Boiled cauliflower, smashed up (but not mashed), with butter, cream, Parmesan cheese, garlic powder, and lots of salt and pepper

And here is where I really have to brag.  My daughter eats just about everything I make.  She eats every kind of meat I’ve ever made (although not every preparation of it).  She actually likes spinach!  She even gobbled up that cabbage I mentioned.  The reason is probably that all of it is cooked with generous amounts of fat, in one form or another.  It’s just so much easier to cook and enjoy food when you realize that fat is not the enemy.  And Sammy loves fat, as I’ve mentioned before.

The bottom line is that carby foods are not the only convenience foods.  It’s faster and easier to grill up a steak than it is to boil spaghetti and put canned sauce on it!  It’s just a matter of habit and mindset.

New Rules

We have three new rules in our house:

  1. Sammy may only have one bite of any candy, dessert, or other sugary sweet treat. 
  2. Protein for breakfast every day.  No more cereal for breakfast.
  3. Every day, including weekends, Sammy gets dressed immediately after waking up.

As Sammy has gotten older, her reaction to too much sugar has gotten more severe.  The other day, I let her have a cup of hot chocolate (half a package of the powdered stuff) with no food to go along with it, and she was a monster until the moment she took a bite of yogurt.  Then she became totally normal.  The very next day we attended a birthday party, and since the children were only given about 10 minutes to eat their pizza, Sammy probably only managed to have 3-4 bites.  (She’ll take up to an hour to eat a meal if we let her.)  Then they had cupcakes.  Within seconds, the birthday girl (who ate 2 cupcakes!) turned from a sweet, calm little girl into some strange spastic creature who couldn’t stop pointing and grunting and laughing maniacally.  Sammy’s version of the insanity was to throw a fit about getting her coat on and continue the pissy behavior for the next hour.

I noted a long time ago that Sammy’s major shift into the tyrannical threes came at the same time she started school.  Since then, I’ve noticed that the snacks at her school are always some form of carbs and sugar.  Crackers and fruit, usually.  I tried the “protein for breakfast” rule early on, but I gave it up because of the time involved in cooking eggs or sausage in the morning.  But I think it’s worth another shot.

And the getting dressed thing.  Lordy lordy.  That girl takes so long to get dressed, even when she is cooperating fully.  She was 20 minutes late to the birthday party because she just wouldn’t put on her pants.  (Of course, she was exactly 20 minutes late because I had told her that if she made us more than 20 minutes late, we weren’t going at all.  I know she can’t read a clock, but she can sure read her mommy.)  I figure that it’s best to get this particular hurdle over and done with before anything else, and when there is the least pressure to get out the door.  Thank god for timers!  They turn an hour long battle into a 20 minute bore, but I’ll take it.

I keep waiting for this phase to pass, but it seems to be permanent: Sammy loves elbows.  She is always coming up to Adam and me, pinching our elbows, and saying, ELBOWWWWWW, ELBOWWWWWW.  She clenches her jaw and it sounds like she is chanting and having some kind of spiritual experience.  My theory is that she can pinch an elbow without hurting us (try it!), and what she really loves is pinching.  Leave it to a child to find a loophole to the “no pinching” rule.

As a dog, Toby loves to play in the snow.  Adam and I have always found it cute how he burrows around in it and then comes up with a little puff of white dust on his nose.  A long time ago, we started making Scarface references whenever we saw him do it: “Co-cay-ina,” (cocaine) and “Say hello to my little friend.”  Now, Sammy likes to entertain our guests by telling them, SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND CO-CAY-INA.  Hopefully nobody will have any idea what she is saying.

The other night we were having dinner and Sammy was in a bad mood.  Predictable, but still hilarious:

Would you like anything more to eat?

I’M NOT!

I asked if you were still hungry.

IT’S NOT FAIR.  I’M NOT EATING.  I’M HUNGRY AND IT’S NOT FAIR AND I’M NOT TALKING TO YOU ANY MORE.

Please use nice words to tell us what you want.

I’M TELLING YOU!  IT’S NOT NICE.

You’re very contrary tonight.

NO, I’M NOT!

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